Good grief

This is the stuff about adoption that is mentioned in parenting classes but not really drilled home. Anyone expecting life to be perfect with an adopted child hasn't done any research...but even when prepared, things like this are a sharp reminder that this child has had a different start to life. I've blogged before about Mae waking up from her nap in a state of grief. The last 3 wakings have been murder. Eyes glazed over, screaming in fury, stiff-as-a-board...it's rough. Yesterday I decided to hold her and see if it would comfort her at all. It didn't. I think she eventually stopped screaming because she was exhausted, not thanks to me. It didn't feel right to put her down though...how can I let a baby sit sobbing on the floor? At least in my arms I knew I was TRYING to help her, although truthfully it probably just made her all the madder. I spoke with a counseler at CCAI today who confirmed that thought and suggested next time I make sure to be right next her her, touching her, but not necessarily HOLDING her. I wonder if the shots on Monday had anything to do with this? I knew we would have some issues...although I expected this sort of thing at the beginning and not 3 months into our relationship. Oh well...we will be there for her nonetheless. No matter what and forever.